With the number of matches made between clients in Zurich and Geneva on the rise, I’d like to write about Long Distance Relationships (LDRs). According to Wikipedia, “a long-distance relationship is typically an intimate relationship that takes place when the partners are separated by a considerable distance.”

Distance is a relative concept
Clients who are, for example, Canadian or American often report being open to meeting a partner who lives up to a 1.5 hour drive from them. Clients who are not exposed to regularly driving longer distances could define a 1.5 hour distance from a partner as a LDR.

However, we also have an American client who, now that he is in Geneva, loves Switzerland so much that he would like to meet a life partner in the same city. To him even Nyon, a 10-minute train ride from Geneva, now seems too far away.

One of the comments we often hear when we propose a match between clients from Geneva or Lausanne and Zurich is that they will only be able to see each other on weekends. This is true; however, we also know many couples who live in the same town, or even under the same roof, who see each other only on weekends due to busy professional lives and heavy travelling.

Maintaining the relationship
I was engaged in 1990 when my fiancé was studying at the ETH (Swiss Federal Institute of Technology) in Zurich, Switzerland and I was finishing up my studies at UC Berkeley in the US. Though it’s hard to believe, there was no email at the time and calling on the phone probably cost USD 3.80 (EUR 2.80) a minute. We used to write letters and send cards.

I remember it felt bizarre seeing each other over the Christmas holiday. We both realised that it was easy to grow apart being so far away with poor communication. That’s when we decided we wanted to be together and get married. Pierre gave up his PhD studies in Switzerland and followed me to Berkeley to do an MBA. Thank you Pierre!

Modern forms of communication
Although you might be able to see each other less frequently than you wish, with modern forms of communication you can connect as frequently as you would like. There is email, mobile phones, text messages, Twitter, Skype, webcams and good old-fashioned snail mail to keep you close while living apart.

I really recommend Skype with webcam. It is very easy to download from the internet (even I could do it!) and it is completely free. I also recommend Twitter, which is free as well, and enables people to keep updated on the little things that make up the day.

Of course there can be circumstances that may make someone less interested in dating someone who lives at a considerable distance, and we completely respect our clients’ wishes in this area. For example, when a client has children in school, meeting someone who lives at a considerable distance as opposed to in the same area could unnecessarily complicate life for him/her.

Going the extra mile

There is more pressure on a first date between clients from Zurich and clients from Geneva or Lausanne. People tend to consider the distance when deciding whether they would like to meet their date again. If they doubt whether their date could be the right person for them, people tend to think that, “he/she is too far away, it will not work”. When, on the other hand, the first meeting is very positive, clients happily go the extra mile for the right partner.

Most people would not like a LDR to continue for too long. At some point in time, the ideal is for the two partners to be together. Even though at the beginning of the LDR it may not be clear how it will happen, if the relationship is strong enough and both partners are motivated to be together, it will happen.

In conclusion
LDRs can be challenging, however, they can work!

It is true that Long Distance Relationships (LDRs) require trust, commitment, excellent communication skills and effort; however, so do relationships of people who live in the same town! A successful Long Distance Relationship should end in the two partners being close to each other. Although it may not be clear from the start how the two partners will be together, where there's a will, there is a way.

Text by Trea Tijmens, from her blog its all about love anyway.